Anyway, I need to ponder what has been transcendent in my life the past 2 or 3 weeks...or basically the recent past. Thinking back a lot of things have had an impact on my life. Some good, some bad, some just kinda neutral. I guess I just want to post some of this just for my recollection of events and stuff that really has made my view on life different. First, Amy leaving for the semester definitely gave a perspective on something. The fact that there are those few people in life that are meant to be in your life...and make a huge impact in it. It is one of those unexplained things that you just don't know...when,....where...why this person will enter your life. In my instance, it was just a random encounter at an IST study session freshman year...amazing! Unfortunately, I don't think I completely realized this until she left for the semester... Why must this be? That we don't realize some of the special things in life until they leave? Fortunately, this is temporary...for we will be reunited as roommates this summer! yay! But I almost feel guilty for not realizing this...but I think she knows she's the coolest roomie in the world!!! What made me realize this? I'm not really sure how to pinpoint it.. It is just the little things...like having that person to just chat about anything at anytime. It probably could be the middle of the night and if something really was bothering one of us...we'd have no problem waking the other up. It's just that unique.
Second thing probably isn't so good, yet at the same time an important realization. Realization of how precious life really is. Watching a person deal with death is a painful experience. Made me realize how important it really is to make the extra effort to keep contact with everyone. Even if I'm tired, it's worth the extra 5 mins to let them know you're thinking about them. You just never ever know...that one little comment could be something that makes the difference. And anyway I realize I shouldn't feel forced to say these things...its just natural. Making that extra call to family relatives and stuff that I may have took for granted. Just hearing the chipper voice on the other end makes the day well worth it. I realize how much I love certain people in my life and how much people mean to me. I think I knew about this before but this was the first time I really sat down and thought about it a lot... So thank you guys! You rock! You know who you are:-)
There's also the realization that things are only as bad as you make them. If you want to make things awful and sucky, well you can. But if you want to make things good, you have the power to fix things. Yes, it may be a bump in the road but things need to be put in perspective. Again this is put into perspective due to certain circumstances. I know this is something that is repeated over and over but it is so true....things aren't really as bad as you make it. Writing a report...is that really the worst thing in the world?
Third...realization of what certain people's roles in your life are. I thought I knew where people stood in my life but over this past semester some of the pieces began to really fall in place. Some people I grew closer to, others not necessarily fall apart but stayed as is. Hard to explain how this works because I don't see the relevance of revealing names and such....because they are all my friends. They all mean a lot to me...it's just their particular role in life. As it feels that each person has a role in life....not necessarily the same role their whole life...but at some point it's some type of role. Life is not static as is apparent just from a world standpoint but the roles are all there. There's those people that play the role as always there when needed, people to go and just shoot the breeze with, etc. There's so many roles which is what really makes life unique in many ways. Unpredictability has always been a part of life, and this semester really opened my eyes to that.
Things evolve daily....it's just so unpredictable just like State College weather! But you know what...I think that is just fine....who wants to live knowing every detail about everything. Maybe someone does...but I know I want to keep on the path of learning...learning about life and where it leads me. I'll never know the meaning of life (no not 42) but I think I'll learn something new daily. I just don't know it....
So I suppose I'd like some feedback...I know many probably never think about stuff at this level...but let me know your thoughts. Have you ever thought about things at all levels? Post some comments. I'm curious to know.